4. Peer Review
In this person’s paper, it was a good paper I think my partner just had some things mixed up. For starters, I think all of my partner’s ideas were too compact. She did not spread them out enough, which at times would make it very confusing when reading the essay. Also, I pointed out in the second paragraph that when siting the book she only did the book and not the author for the first time. Next time she should have added the author’s name as well which I suggested. Another suggestion I had was to use in the second to last paragraph I thought that the article would become better if she used an outside source and would give the paper just a little bit more information than it needed. With that little addition it would excell her pager greatly. Also one thing I siad the writer should stay away from words that are contractions becuase I have been taught it can come off as informal or not profesinal. Overall, my main things when writing it on my paper were break the thoughts up, and just fix up some small things such as a little grammar and everything should be good. However, there were plenty of thigns I did like about this essay. One thing I really liked was the usage and quality of some of the quotes. The quote, “build around weak ties..There is strength in weak ties, as the sociologist Mark Granovetter has observed. Our acquaintances–not our friends–are our greatest source of new ideas and information” in the second paragraph was my favoirte quote becuase it went into depth about how the idea of weak ties and with our friends are the greatest source of ideas. Another thing I liked about this essay was just the ideas of the essay, I liked the majority of it and enjoyed reading it.
